• Nicole Langman

Boundaries 101

My goodness I love this topic! In fact, I love it so much (and I believe it is so important) that I've created a video workshop to help with setting and maintaining healthy personal boundaries.


We know that boundaries are essential for mental health, but we struggle to put them in place. Why is that?


Two reasons:


1. Fear - Fear of hurting others. Fear of what people will say about us. Fear of pushback. Fear of rejection.


2. Confusion - What are boundaries? How do we put them in place? Are boundaries and walls the same thing?


We teach people how to treat us, and when we lack boundaries we are essentially saying, anything goes. But anything doesn't go, does it? In fact, sometimes we get hurt, feel mistreated, taken advantage of, and abused. That's why boundaries are integral to wellness.


Boundaries are essential for good mental health. They are physical or emotional limits we put in place to keep ourselves well. Healthy boundaries help us define our identity, our individuality, and indicate what we are comfortable with and responsible for.


Here's a quick how-to:


Step 1. Identify and define what you need. (eg. space, support, respect, clarification,)

Step 2. Communicate in a respectful and assertive way.

Step 3. Don't over explain, just keep it simple.

Step 4. Determine consequences, or set limits.


Here's an example of a healthy assertive boundary:


"My evenings are precious times with my family, so I don't respond to texts after dinner."


"I can see that you are upset, and I am happy to talk with you about this. But I am feeling disrespected by your tone. If you are going to continue to speak to me that way, our conversation will be over."


The topic of boundaries is enormous, so if it's something you might want to work on, consider joining me for the upcoming Boundaries video series. Just follow my Instagram and Facebook pages

IG: nicole_langman_officialpage, or FB: Nicole Langman


Looking forward to journeying with you towards stronger boundaries.


God Bless,

Nicole

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